Joyeux Noël!

No need to say it again for the third time though. I hope you had a good night partying, drinking/eating, exchanging gifts and hugging people. For kids who slept through the occasion, now's the time to open your promising gift boxes under your Christmas trees, or check on your sock to see if mommy/daddy snuck out last night to play Santa.

Me? I'm good, I'm good. But it doesn't matter ok. What I want is for you guys to enjoy yourselves. Gimme coffee/milk/bubble tea and I'll be fine. You still have a few more days before the holidays end. Boo.

So, tell me, what did you get? (That is, by the way, a rhetoric in which I do not expect any response because I'm forever alone. But if you feel like sharing, you are more than welcome to do so.)

Ok ok, who among you got drunk last night? Lol.

des lumières dans le ciel nocturne

Firework photos from UP Lantern Parade 2011. I'm gonna update more as December goes, I don't know, wanna catch up I guess. And yes, more light photos are coming!

I miss you Kate!! Awesome photos from her, btw.

maison de mon ami

Last Saturday I went to Marion's house on Village East to help him with their org site layout. Actually, it's not help, I coded the whole thing. Lol. My original plan was to drop by at Denese's but didn't end up so. She had errands and I thought we'd only take about 10 minutes, not enough time for catching up and kissing each other's foreheads.




Those are my hands. It was hard to shoot with low light. Marion took this obviously.


Marion's. I took this, focusing on the keys on purpose.


OH GOD THE SWEETEST PUP IN THE WORLD. Meet Bosing!


And their Siberian husky... I never got to know its name. Beautiful eyes... *gasps*




My Monokuro Boo coin purse. Yesterday I freaked out because I thought I lost it, it had my flash drives and memory cards that contain awesome/important/lmaolmao files. It wasn't until almost midnight when my little brother asked, "If I found it, what would my reward be?" So I bribed him and he fished it out of his pocket! Naughty naughty. I'm doomed though.






So there. I took light photos but I'm reserving it for Christmas!

ne dites jamais au revoir

Oh my god. When I found out Dippin' Dots filed for bankcruptcy about a month ago, I'd gone bananas. The alleged Ice Cream of the Future could slowly be the lolli of my past.

But no, they're not closing yet. Sigh, it's obvious what I'm trying to do here: take my mind off things, or thing. I've always adored ice cream and I believe this photo would cheer me up, if only I let it. I've been eating nonstop since yesterday, plate after plate after bowl after fucking bowl. I don't usually whine, but when I do it would go on for ages. My die-hard fan (lol Sushi) is gone gone.

I need a huge bowl of caramel cheesecake-flavoured ice cream, or that choco-vanilla-banana shake my friend Nel introduced me to. It tastes like heaven to be honest. It could be better than heaven, though. I mean, I won't know, will I?

I'll be fine in a few days I guess. I cried all day when I saw Sushi's empty food bowl and the milk he never got to finish.

Ice cream, dude. Ice cream.

I swear this is the last time I'll moan about my pet's death. I'm sorry for being whiny, I just can't help it. I can't cry in front of my family because I never show them any tears. So yeah.

As the saying goes, "when life gives you lemons... make a lemonade."



But no, no, I won't make any stupid lemonade. Lemons make better partners with tequila. O...k, it's not like I enjoy tequila. But oh well.

R.I.P. Sushi

I'm so hurt right now, this is 26x worse than my last breakup. It's like my heart's being... I don't know, squeezed? Twisted?

My puppy died this afternoon, while I was out. I've been told he suffered before dying. I can't even...

My widdle shushi... it breaks my heart..... ok now that he's gone, who will lick me awake in the middle of the night!? I must admit sometimes I found it annoying, but one night I found out why: I was crying in my sleep and yes, he was trying to wipe my tears omg. My stubborn lazy puppy wiping my stupid nightmare tears. I. Can't. Fucking. Believe. It. Remember the time when I told you every time we call his name he won't come? Unless you have a milk bowl in hand, there's no hope luring him to you. Lol. Typical of him.



Albeit his misdemeanors, Sushi has manners. I mean had. I need to get used to this oh god. I still can't believe he's gone. Well anyway, when he pees/vomits on the mat, he actually folds it or sits on it (lol) so my Mom won't see. He knew how much she hates mess. Lol, he really did.

I enjoy solitary moments at home, even before he came to my life. When Sushi arrived it changed, I started to get used to him snuggling with me and his occasional pillow-wrestling. But now that he's gone, I can't even think about lying down with my thoughts without his annoying bounce and snuggles.



I can't, I can't write any more. This is too painful for me to bear. All these memories of my puppy and me... oh god. I know I'm such a ninny lol, but if the only creature who values you passes away, you'll get what I mean.

Sushi does not complain when I wrestle with him! Gently, of course. He knows this command where I sit on the floor, cover my ears and yell "Rape!" It's actually an invitation for him to "attack" me. Lol.

Lol. Lol. Lol. I found it funny when he barks at his reflection. Lol. And that time when...

I need to laugh. I hate my annoying puffy eyes.

Sushi why'd you go without saying goodbye!? I just got home okay. I slept over at Nel's for two nights and spazzed about guys and books. I was laughing the whole two days without knowing that my little baby was suffering. I can't help but feel guilty. But what's done's done.



Maybe he didn't want me to remember him like that? When Kimbap died, it was also the time when I slept over at Nel's.

Coincidence?

Cool, man. Cool. I'm trying to be as cheerful as possible. For my sake. For Sushi's soul's sake (if he ever has one) (I bet he does!) (because I say so).

I should light joss sticks.

Goodbye my baby. /cries forever

images aléatoires

Just trying to fill this somewhat empty blog...

This is not a recent photo of me.


My little brother Sean and his birthday cake. It kind of doubled as his wife that night, too. LOL.

The plane got delayed and everyone kind of got sleepy so I took the opportunity to snap a sleeping shot of them strangers! I'm so evil I can't even.

Sunset at the highlands. Gives me the creeps.

This is the 30th post in this blog. I don't know if it has some meaning or whatever, but I just want this post to be filled with dizzying, if not nostalgic colors. Also, I don't want to bore my readers with my irascible but heart-felt rants and ravings.

PS, Congratulations to us, lazyasses for finally updating our gay blogs: Izzie, Tqa. May we continue blogging in the name of ourselves. *rolling on the laugh flooring*

lumières brillantes partout!

I find lights bewitching.

Winter Thirst

The joy of not

knowing

casual retreat

to oblivion

Maybe innocence?

How long should I

wait

for snow to chew

and cold

to hug my sweating

spirit?

The rippling ice

forever

cutting into my burns

The angry white

heat

of snowflakes gently

melting

I cannot discern

Then perhaps

it would be best

not to know

winter

after all.

décembre

x x x

All hail the season of gifts and love and twinkly lights that choke my Christmas tree.

But but... I wasn't expecting the rough days to end within the span of December. It will be a gateway to more flood of tears and frustrations. Well, it'd be a little over two more months before 2011 ends. Hopefully the year of the Dragon would be hot.

And let's not forget about Christmas! Oh god why am I such a negative-thinker!? Maybe it doesn't do any good at all. Yes, it does spare me from disappointments. But still.

Leap of faith; that's what I need...

...and a really sweet steaming cup of hot cocoa every night.

quand je lève les yeux...

When I look up, I don't see the sky immediately...


The view would be instantly obscured by leaves and clouds and life-threatening amount of dust hovering mid-air. Not to mention the cruel rays of the bright, legendary ball. Then beyond what seemed like everything, there, stretched like a lover's arm waiting for an embrace, goes the sky. My sky. My never-ending breadth of blue. Albeit, I've never been a color-blue person. I dislike the color so much the only blue clothing I've got is my track uniform. I used to be a varsity athlete during my junior year, and although our team is called the Golden Phoenix, that didn't stop our coach from picking the color in question.

Je veux le livre de Fifi Lapin!

Before I begin this lustful post, I want you to know that the images are from likklegirl, fifi-lapin and afeminada. Now that I've credited the owners, I can now commence.

If you don't know Fifi yet, surely you can't not have seen an image of her somewhere. She's on tumblr, on people's blog layouts, on weheartit, on flickr. She's everywhere, the unforgettable fashion bunny who tells people what to wear because it's awesome.

To cut things (and silk laces) short, Fifi is the style bunny you might wanna consult if you have severe wardrobe malfunction. I'm not a fashionista myself, but I can't help but love her art.

Fifi's bio:

Hi, I'm Fifi Lapin... I was born one of 257 brothers and sisters but sadly there was an outbreak of myxomatosis when I was just one year old... I was the only one that survived. My parents are therefore incredibly protective of me and spoil me rotten. I'm an hare-ss to my fathers fortune which he made playing fast and loose with carrot and lettuce shares on the international stock market. There are a lot of rabbits out there eating carrots and lettuce so I guess he just struck gold (or orange you might say). Some people think I’m just a socialite but I think there is more to me than just an extremely stylish clotheshorse!

I should stop beating around the bush...

OH GOD I WANT HER STYLE BOOK.

It's partly because I can follow her divine fashion, and make-up advice with devotion.

But the larger part was... I want to take photos of her pages. They're just so chic and the art... très beau!

Grace Escudero of theafeminada.com wrote,

This book chronicles how Lapin chooses different outfits for different events. Events include fashion shows, date nights and convincing your father not to take away your credit card (pay good attention to the last one). In each Chapter, Lapin tries on several outfits, states why she likes them, how they can be improved and so forth. Near the end of each chapter she comes to the conclusion that she is too indecisive, so she enlists the help of prominent fashion designers such as Anna Sui. Lapin interviews the designers then asks them to choose an outfit for her from their collections.

And look, it has a Korean and Chinese version too!!

I can't believe I want it so badly I blogged about it.

débordant la bouche

"Don't bite off more than you can chew." All I can say is: "Don't go near the chocolate fondue."

And don't put sliced bananas within my reach, they'd most likely end up in my mouth. Nothing happened, really. I wasn't trying to suppress a sneeze. My friend didn't take that photo; I wasn't even chewing a mouthful of bananas avec chocolate sauce. And I was not eating a gobful of chopped—surprise!—bananas while I was about to sneeze. And elephants are microwaves.

Fuck fuck. Why am I being like this anyway? Ugh I'm, if anything, a derp in full throttle.

I wasn't aware that the previous post was... well, posted. It was full of typo errors (corrected them already) and to think that it was my 11/11/11 err... post. I must've written it a few weeks ago and scheduled it. Oh god. Oh god it's fun italicizing post. It's like, giving post a brand new place in society, a new money. This post ends now. I hope I didn't freak you out with this post.

Sadness?

Must we know sadness?

salty tears with hearty sobs

escaping

from tight throats

Must we treat it with respect?

The invisible

force

Sending us to our knees

without even touching our

skin

Mercilessly blinds our eyes

with hopelessness

Disentangles us

from the embraces of

glory

Must we let it in,

if it's the only one

knocking?

Must we let it tear

our heartstrings apart?

Does it always

need

a company?

mon propre crépuscule

I like the sunset; harbinger of the dark, silky velvet where the moon and a million more stars are pinned to.



It's warm, and unlike sunrise, it whistles cooler wind. The latter would rather bring on the heat instead. I live in a tropical archipelago, and like my friend Izzie said, "If it's not sunny, it's raining". True, true. Rare are the days when the clouds clump together, shielding us against the sun's innocent-but-vicious rays. Even rarer are the moments when there's just cool breeze without the presence of raindrops. I love soft drizzles, and I fall even deeper for them when I'm inside; protected from the elements.

People who love quoting "There are people who see a glass half-full, and some, half-empty." And they'll probably deem me as the pessimistic one because of my love for sunsets and endings. I'm not a fan of beginnings to be honest, and before I finish this post I want to let you know that I'm neither of the two seers. I'm someone who would rather hurl the damn glass on the wall, shattering it to pieces. I'm not hostile, but sometimes I wait for no more fuss and revel in silence. Sometimes I want to stop thinking, and seeing the sun set stops my train of thought.

I'm always on edge and it actually pushes me off the cliff of my patience, letting me fall dumbly on the space below. I'm tired of people who urge me to think positive. It's just not me okay?

papillon

A butterfly flew inside our home. Sushi, my puppy, wasn't very keen on seeing the flimsy flyer. He kept barking at it though it sounded gay and his voice cracked every time. It fluttered around for a few minutes until it circled back to the window. It was shut, unfortunately for the flutter-by. It probably thought "WTF I'm stuck. I freeze now lah," and pretended to not exist for half an hour so I decided to take some photos.



I touched the butterfly! Remember the time when they were warning us about the dust on their wings because it could cause blindness? Those days are gone--for me. Hell, I touched the butterfly.

I happened to be playing Cooking Mama on my brother's Nintendo DSi--it was the only camera available--so the photos are portrayed on grayscale. The quality sucks.

Oh, don't worry, I opened the window to set it free.

souvenirs d'enfance

The first photo was taken from when I was 5. Before or after trick-or-treating, I can't be sure. For all I know there's a nyummy-lookin' dome of Chupa Chups and a vintage-looking SLR camera on the center table. And yeah, I always show up as a pumpkin stuffing during Halloween. I dunno, maybe because I like eating squash and it was practically the only vegetable I used to eat. Save for potatoes and corn.

Don't ask me why because I'm not sure why I was wearing an over-sized kimono either. I mean, I'm Chinese lol. Was it during one of my childhood friends' birthday party? A tea party? If it was a tea party, why wasn't I wearing a cheonsam? Oh well, it was an occasion all right and there was a gorgeous ice sculpture behind me in all its blazing glory. If ices can uh, blaze.

Today I turn eighteen, and reaching such age—no matter how cliché—is both a gift and a curse. They're together like Yin and Yang. I am officially, legally an adult now; an adult, a new label I'm being forced to wear. I won't get to wear it like a shirt though. It's not something you peel off your body when it gets soiled. Being an adult means... well, I dunno. I just turned into one a few hours ago.

It's a tattoo. I have it on my skin, and I can have it on my tongue (not to mention my piddly diddly parts) (like, my tummy, wait what were you thinking!?). It's something I'll wear for the rest of my life. It's not necessarily a brand or a label, but the word gives a whole new nuance to my existence. I don't know, to be honest.

I showed you a slice of my childhood. I can't believe I can now officially take on what the song Fireflies (Owl City) really means.

novembre

x x x

livre gros et angoissant

His surname serves his reputation well. In my opinion, Stephen King is king of one of the horror-and-thriller-themed kingdoms in the planet where only authors exist.

This short and fat book is actually his first short story collection since Skeleton Crew. Oh, that information came from Google. Been reading this for a while, since tomorrow would be the day for the alleged zombies and witches to come back to life, I'd decided to snap photos of it and post it, ta-da!, here. Oh, you should really read it.

My favorites are Suffer the Little Children, Chattery Teeth, Sneakers and that story about the two brothers who discovered something called The Calmative. I forgot the title of that piece, I'm so sorry.

Suffer the Little Children is creepy. Have a happy halloween, and good luck to your loot bags if you're going out trick-or-treating. One more reminder, don't read Stephen King before going out tonight. Just saying.

oh s'il vous plaît

Sharing some old photos of mine. Yada yada, nice day eh?

(For those who knew what really was written in here, please forget about it. I don't want it chronicled in this blog. Such bad vibes.)