Rainy Martini

January 02, 2014

Kuma Chronicles: The Beginning

Here we are. We just got to the part where we had to reveal the truth. The truth of all evil. The truth of all the lies and the truth of the truth and the truth of the brush: toothbrush. Recent studies show that my Kuma has the intelligence of a three-year-old, and the emotional reaction of an elementary child. I was aghast! Today we reveal the truth. Today we tell the world what had happened, what actually happened!

The footage we found reveals a very strong evidence against Milku, an alleged brain surgeon.



Kuma: WHAT. WHO THAT. ME NO KNOW WHO MILKU IS!


Kuma: MOHOHO ME HAD FRIEND. ME SEZY PHOTO. BABE? SEE MY SEZY PIC?


Kuma: ME NO REMEMBER BRAIN SURGERY. WHAT BRAIN? ME NO HAS BRAIN!


Kuma: HUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHU


Kuma: *watches intently*


Kuma: ME NO FEEL HURT. MOHOHOHO


Kuma: YAYYYY MILKU GOT BRAIN!


Kuma: WHAT. BRAIN, NUUU. NU BRAIN NOOO COME BACK PLEASE.


Kuma: NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!


Kuma: MILKU WHAT ABOUT ME BRAIN!!


Kuma: THAT BITCH. BITCH SLUT WHORE!!


Kuma: AHH ME KNOW THIS DAY. BIRTHDAY!!

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There you have it. My first post of the year! How was your NY celebration? Mine involved calming an angry customer down. It was fun, oh it was really really fun. Ugh. I'm not writing a resolution, I'm not doing any of that crap because I won't do it anyway. But I promise I will try to improve this blog and myself. I will try.

1 comment:

  1. In fairness to Milku, he knows how to open a bear's head. Kuma looks like a clam.

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