Rainy Martini

November 28, 2012

Fear

Not too long ago, I was gathering dust. Idle. Bored, I lusted for something to do with the time that stretched up to the milky way before me. But now I'm so busy, I waste so many hours everyday traveling... so fast, it's so fast. I can't remember what it was like to simply have nothing to do. I can't get over how quick the lapses are. I want to stop talking about it, but the thoughts linger inside my head. Linger, they do. And they thrive, too. Feeding on my fears and uncertainties.

I fear for my dreams. They are changing, moving. If they don't stop I might lose them altogether. Even my ridiculous aspirations no longer exist. I don't daydream anymore, although I still find myself longing for what could have been in my spare time.

I am afraid of what I'm becoming, I never wanted to be... pragmatic.





Also, I'm having a hard time right now. Uhh... most days I feel like hiding in a tight space or something.

These light streaks were taken by me last year at my good friend Marion's house. I meant to post these some twelve months ago, but I never got round to. So now they're here, in this blog, just as they should be.

Are you excited for Christmastime?

4 comments:

  1. I've been in your position before, it was really hard actually I am still in that position right now, I don't know what to do because my dream had changed.. so i don't really know how to comfort you, but let me tell you..whatever you're going through right now, I hope you'll feel better.

    Take care Rainy, <3
    Shahara,xx
    ara-oundtheworld.blogspot.com

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  2. You wanna be a stripper now? LOL!

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  3. "I waste so many hours everyday traveling."

    Sigh.

    Well, in a way, I feel as if you are working towards your dream. At least one of them.

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  4. So beautiful sis! ♥♥♥♥♥

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