Rainy Martini

April 17, 2012

I can't take it

Photo from gryfon

I'm having a bad time. I wish I could start this post with a better word wizardry but I can't. I don't feel at ease. I'm sorry for not being able to respond to your queries/tags/e-mails on time, I rarely go online.

Let's say the events that occur right now is a layered cake.

First layer:
My dog is dying. *cries* I just got him about a few months ago, he's only like 4 months old. I won't go into details because it makes me cry so yeah. Coco is dying. I feel so alone and unloved.

Second layer:
Lara (my friend/music center schoolmate) is ignoring me. She kept complaining how we didn't see each other for about a month and that I should go out. I told her I can't because there are problems at home and it's so stressing.

A few days ago, she asked me out to the bookstore or somewhere. I told her I can't promise anything. The day passed and boom. She doesn't even respond to my IMs. Ugggh Lara you...!

Then she told me how I broke my promise. Never mind that we talked through MSN and there's a fucking archive. Never mind that I never said I'd make it.


So most of my real life friends are ignoring me. Wow. Wow. Just because I can't go out.

Third layer:
Some fucking reptile bit my ankle. I was in the middle of the rice field AND IT JUST BIT ME. Wtf. I was lucky its fangs didn't go deeper into my flesh. It was just some kind of scratch. I won't go into details again. I'm not in danger of anything but I can't walk properly though.

Fourth later:
As you probably know, my two siblings who have been away from us for years flew home about a week ago. They're just not the same, it's hard to keep up with their brand new personality which is altogether demanding and really inconsiderate.

The cherry on top:


I didn't wanna tell you all this.

PS: I do enjoy having like 7 kids at home at the moment. But sometimes they fight and it's like, reaaaally annoying.


  1. I know exactly what you feel - way too many problems and you just want to blurt it out.
    Poor dog! :( I don't like to see or hear cute dogs dying and suffering even if they're not mine anymore. I've been there and it's so hurtful. I hope Coco will be all right.

  2. Awww I hope you feel better though. It's sad that your puppy is dying, considering that he's just a few months old - I'm sure God has better plans for you. Who knows, you'll own another pet one day and you'll feel loved like how your puppy made you feel. As for your sisters, well, I guess that's pretty normal considering the fact that they were able to live at a different kind of place, mingling with different kinds of people and adjusting with a different kind of practices. It's hard to cope with something like that, but I guess people change - but that doesn't mean that they love you less.

    Sis, I really hope you feel better soon. I guess you should just look at the bright side. At least you have plenty of time to be with your family, with the kids at your home - also I guess your friend would understand if you go just go talk to her. Tampuhan lang yan sis <3 Namimiss ka lang nya siguro. :D

  3. Poor snake, it must've needed some anti-venom after biting you. LOL.

  4. @Gail @Michael thank you for those heartfelt words :)


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